Wow - what a police farce. Hopefully all the stories told were politically correct and not Enid Blyton.

   Once Upon A Time .....The land was protected, road and byway, street and lane, track and footpath by tall stalwart men in uniform, bearing a crown upon their high helmets. After many years of law suits, timid magistrates and impostors in forged uniform, the land fell under the power and into the grip of hairless pale creatures, big eared and violent hooded street ghouls.The good folk dared not leave their homes unguarded. Innocents, young and old remained barricaded in their houses after dark. The once proud constabulary had been reduced to making photographic images of fast moving carriages in the hope that when vehicular traffic is brought to a standstill those once heroic men in blue would pounce, storming in and out of gridlocked cars,buses,tramcars and perambulators and impose enough fixed penalties upon the operators that they could no longer move around the land. The big eared street monsters were unperturbed,as they were able to carry on their mindless societal rape and plunder at will. And They All Lived Unhappily Ever After. THE END

   Morlock was nice to write a comment alas Ma'am / Sir, the police aint no force anymore since they became institutionally politicaly correct. They are a service, a woeful one at that!

   Sorry.....the police are right out of touch with the folk who pay their wages. Our requirements are very simple....fight real crime and make our streets safe. If you can't do that, go find another job and let someone else have a go.

   When will this profligate bufoonery end!??.....they're a police force for gods sake!!! They are there to lock up scrotes and criminals, not to fool about in expensive (to us taxpayers) jackanory sessions!!!

....utterly pathetic (and embarrassing)!

   This is a little early for April fools day isn't it?

This is giving the public sector a really bad reputation. There are so many public bodies delivering services to the people of the UK that outside consultants should not be required to do this sort of thing.

If they want the Police to share experiences then open up a tab in the bar after their shift and get them to meet up and socialise. I'm sure this is what the Police rank and file do anyway.

Homer Simpson must be in charge.

   It was not detectives who attended this session, it was every senior officer in the force (chief inspector upwards).

They had to then deliver the lesson to every officer in their departments. Apparently it was embarassing for all involved!

   Here’s a story: - ‘t’was a cold misty dawn that rose over Rochdale, the police station was alive at 06:00 hrs when the hypnotic silence was broken by police vans testing sirens which signalled to the work shy and those wanting work that it was time to rise from their slumber. Rochdale, a town with seven concrete ugly sisters towering above the mist with its mobile transmitters to fry (allegedly) the poor unsuspecting tenants of a so called housing company that abandoned them years ago in favour of spending money on a nice empty council building in minrow. The wolves in the big black box take all the town’s folk pennies to build a new castle claiming the relatively new black box is an eyesore. Alas, the seven ugly sisters put a spell on the bad wolves which allows the ugly sisters to vanish into the mist so the three little piggies cant blow them down so the wolves won’ have to spend money on them, leaving more money for their new castle and leaving the people to fall ill with depression, fear and poor conditions with some story tellers stories of evil waves descending from transmitters singing from the perches of the sister but like my story and the one Cyril Smith told about Turner brothers being safe, nobody believed them until many years had passed.

The Chief Rat catcher got scarred all those years ago when a story was told about institutional racism, which made the chief wrap himself up in a veil of secrecy. He hid all his catchers in vans and cars giving jobs to community support bunnies who were all pink and fluffy. As the years went by the Rat catcher got more scarred of the rats and was taken over by a wind called institutional political correctness and story telling to the elderly who feared the Rats most of all but who were the least likely to be eaten.

This left the poor town folk feeling bereft of any hope, t’was the day the law finally kidnapped justice and handed the broken town over to the rats. The town is doomed, community safety is a word dreamed up on the back of a big white van containing two community support bunnies charged with driving the white van around at a time when the poor old folk can see them. The workers, the good and the strong were seen crossing a concrete river hiding a thread of gold to seek out leafy meadows where the sun shone bright in happy town. The story was brought to you by Rochdale Born, a man clinging onto a distant memory rekindled by towns like Bury

   Dear Ms Rogers, being a Manchester tax payer I can tell you what the police force's priorities are and I'll tell you in a simple way so that maybe you'll understand. . . . get out from behind those desks, stop having stupid fairy tale sessions in plush EXPENSIVE hotels with EXPENSIVE consultants who know nothing about running a police force, (mind you neither does Fahy by the looks of it) and get out onto the streets to catch the criminals. The average cop on the street, presuming you can find one of course, would be able to tell you in 30 seconds flat what the "force priorities" should be. Give the law abiding, tax paying public a break and remember it's our money you're wasting.

   Surly the Police hear many fairy tales daily in the course of their investigations without having to pay to hear more. What a waste of money.

   I'm saying nothing...

   13 years of PC bureaucratic Socialism has a lot to answer for!

Our police FORCES are now laughing stocks, rather than feared by the criminal fraternity.

   The reason the Police, as an organisation, wastes money is that they have too much of it in too many different budgets. If they don't use all the money in a particular budget they can't transfer it to a different budget, nor can they carry it over to the next year. So,the following financial year the underspent budget will be reduced by the amount of underspend. Hence, the imperative is to always spend to the limit, which often means that money is wasted on frivolous projects or replacing things needlessly - anything to avoid an underspend. I think it's called good fiscal management.

   Its bad enough paying the cops to tell stories to each other, which is something they do every day as part of their job. What I don't understand is why are GMP paying to hire the Piccadilly Hotel when they have perfectly good facilities at Sedgley Park, Hough End and Chester House and a number of other Police establishments. What a waste of money.

   Good to see the ammount of tax we pay goes to good use - JOKE !!!

   Now what do we see through the round window children?.................it ain't GMP doing their job on the streets.

   Of course ....it is all Mr. Fahy's fault He has been running ALL of GMP for decades. Get a grip.

   I think there is a big difference between telling tales of actual events and telling fairy tales which Jackanory is. I think there will always be someone who can learn from someone else. Its seems that the police on the course were the all seeing all knowing ones; their fact based tales go on the story board which is added to the rest of the phase this is then passed down to the lower ranks to give them a better understanding of something they haven't previously learned, or they have already learnt it but it can be easily forgotten so this story board is pinned in areas where it can be in view all the time to remind them of their duties. Might be a good idea if Manchester Evening New could elaborate more, I mean you just thrown £100000 into 12 small paragraphs.

   A gentle nudge (alright, a good shove, then) to the GMP hierarchy: all appointed police officers, of whatever rank, hold the office of Constable. A Constable has authority (i.e. responsibility) under the Crown for - the protection of life and property; the prevention and detection of crime; and the prosecution of offenders against the Peace (i.e. the normal tranquil state of living). None of the above is optional; it is mandatory, obligatory, compulsory or whatever other word might be necessary to convey the message that this is what Constables must do. Any such officer who intentionally acts other than in accordance with this straight-forward definition is negligent and/or incompetent. The general law-abiding members of the public are not your customers; they are your employers by Crown proxy. Your customers are those who offend against the Peace to the detriment of the Peace. In other words those who break the law to the detriment of society; not those who fail to conform to some edict invented by council officials or some other self-appointed guardian of morals. Read this. Inwardly digest this. Understand this. This is your job description. Get real - get respect. Colbee

   This farce occurred last May,so within this year's budget;now they have no money,and a detection rate only Al Capone would be happy with....If Mr Fahy wants to have the Corporate Model,then also have the Accountability within this excuse of an Organisation...Starting at the top,not the bottom..Like who's idea was it to use the Piccadilly Hotel instead of the Corporate facilities provided by Sedgley Park ?

   Lets have this GMP Federation chap, Ian Hanson, as the next Chief Constable. He appears to understand totally what is happening to this once fine Police Force!

   Ace, It would be about an adopted mixed race lad, with 2 dads, one of which is a trans sexual, the childs sister will be in care, following the imprisonment of one of her lesbian mothers, the remaining one being in re hab for drug abuse. The childs elder brother would be a PCSO on the mean streets of Manchester, doing the job of 4 PC's as Mr Fahy has squandered all of the budget, on diversity and the other nonsense involving Grandma's, eggs and sucking!

   GMP? Greater manchester "Playgroup" . now lets all sit on the floor while i tell you a story about big ears and""bobby"".

   like i said before. there was something fishy about they way the police seem to be needing to cut costs as they couldnt cope on their current budgets. now we know why!

   The levels of incompetence and money wasting ideas by GMP's hierarchy is jaw dropping. So GMP is skint and has been told to pull its socks up in 90 days because of its poor performance and management and along comes another bombshell like this in the wake of future redundancies and recruitment freezes. But not to worry, GMP will spend thousands on fancy name badges to compliment the tacky casual look uniforms.

Because they have put the hold on future recruitment, along comes a massive recruitment campaign for special constables because they dont have to pay them, suprise suprise!!

I have an idea to save GMP money, get rid of all the Police Officers sat behind desks doing roles that a sworn constable is not needed for and get them back on the streets. The dead wood at places like Chester House and divisional Headquarters is frightning. Lazy Cops creating stupid new ideas and procedures, which makes the lives of the front line coppers unbearable so they can justify there cushty little positions. The best part of it is these 9am till 5pm Office Cops get paid the same as a frontline Cop because shift allowances are incorporated in their wages.